Sorry for being a stranger to this blog for over a month.
I guess you can say, I’m still adjusting to being a mom to two small kids, one of them I’ve been exclusively breastfeeding for 5 months. Not to mention managing a full time job that’s been hectic lately (I’ve been working for two weekends now including Mother’s Day!). Throw in the fact that I have a steady pumping schedule every 2-3 hours so my entire schedule revolves around those breaks. And I thought breastfeeding at home was difficult! HA.
Don’t get me wrong. I love being able to bring home bottles of expressed milk for my boy. I do. That feeling when I check my day’s “yield” is priceless. But sometimes it really feels like I’ve turned into a slave of the pump. It has taken control of my life! I’ve had to say no to coffee break invitations and “after work” dinner invites from girlfriends because I know I’ll have to interrupt the chikahan with a pumping break, or worse there’s no accessible place to pump! The constant watching of the clock can also be quite unnerving. Sometimes when I’m in a super long meeting, I get so distracted because my brain goes on panic mode when I hit four hours and I still haven’t pumped yet. The pump is my frenemy. I really have a love-hate relationship with it.
On top of having to deal with the pump, I also have to put in an extra hour in the morning to wash all the parts, sterilize, dry everything and pack the milk bottles and ice packs in the cooler bag. That extra hour used to be my coffee/blogging break or time to just sit back and savor my breakfast. With how things are, the only thing I can savor is my time in the shower. Because that’s the only “me” time I can afford. And that lasts me 15 minutes TOPS!
Since I find myself always rushing from point A to point B, with almost no sleep at all… I feel depleted. I really don’t have the energy for anything else, sadly…including blogging. So while I’m still struggling to keep myself sane, I just want to assure you that I have not fallen off the face of the earth. I’m still here…alive yes, but constantly catching my breath. I look forward to the day when I can find the time, energy and inspiration to start shooting away with those blog entries again.
Until then, let me just send you all a big warm cyber hug! And to all the moms out there, Happy Mother’s Day!